Ah my name being called. Again. And again. And again. And not just being called, but in a high pitch whine or am angry shout. I remember when I was pregnant, I was looking forward to my own little one who would call me mummy. The first time each of my boys called for me by name, it melted my heart. It was special. It still is. But some days, I’d like to change my name!!! It appears that the older my boys get, the more they disagree on things – and it ends up with me being summoned to sort the situation out. This is all well and good – except if I haven’t seen what has happened (how dare I leave the room to make dinner/get a drink/use the toilet!). The problem with me dealing with situations without having seen the is that I never quite know “exactly” what happened. I usually have 3 slightly different versions of the same event. And I’m sure that each of them genuinely believes their version is the right one. From their perspective, what they are saying is exactly how it happened. When they were younger, I tried to get to the bottom of it and find a right and wrong. However, more and more these days, I find this simply isn’t possible all of the time, so we are having to come up with new solutions. I try now to get the boys to work out their difference between them if possible. Some of these issues are so small (someone sitting in their chair, which isn’t actually their chair, just the one they want) that I don’t feel it needs adult interference, especially between the 6yo and 8yo. However, 3 boys close in age often presents problems as they generally act first and think later. They are all bundles of energy and they all have a strong sense of right and wrong – even if it’s only from their perspective. My husband and I are often talking of ways to change their interactions with each other and our interactions with them, but it’s not always easy! Some days, I wonder what on earth we are doing wrong. Some days, I’m more forgiving of myself and realise, it’s a phase. Some days, I can rationalise it all and deal with it. Other days, I separate them as best I can and then do something I know calms them – we get outdoors in the big wide world, go explore and gain some perspective!
How about you? Do your little ones bicker? Do they work problems out for themselves or do you intervene? I’d love to hear other people’s experiences!